So – best laid plans and all! Intended to be studious and get up bright and early to go see the new Jane Campion film featuring Aussie actress Abbie Cornish who is dating Ryan Phillippe.
Well – I did get up but I couldn’t leave the apartment as it was raining cats and dogs. Bloddy typical!! There is always one day like this. So I busied myself indoors until it subsided a little and until the shops were open for me to buy a brolly. I went to Monoprix – supposedly the cheap as chips option only to find umbrellas marked at 34 EURO!!!!!!! You have to be kidding me! I finally found one for 10 euros and that did the job. The morning was spent working, researching and chasing interviews and parties only ro have my scheduled time with Ryan Phillippe and Malin Akerman revoked as the publicist didn’t want ‘too much publicity’ at this stage!! So in that case I won’t mention what film they were here to tout. Surely they risk ‘too much publicity’ if journalists from the national newspapers and film magazines get the interviews??? The mind boggles….
Anyway – got a free lunch today which is always good. Lifestyle resort Nikki Beach were hosting a ‘champagne brunch’ to launch their new range of leaisure clothes (bikinis, kaftans and the like) and Joel madden was scheduled to DJ so I thought we may get to have a brief chat with wifey Nicole Ritchie. No such luck. Joel was a no show – so therefore was Nicole. Other invited guests failed to make an appearance too. There were goodie bags including a lovely scented candle and a Nikki Beach CD but NO CHAMPAGNE AT THE CHAMPAGNE BRUNCH!!
Actually – I lie – a selection of underfed swimwear models did get dosed with a bottle of piper on the beach after they walked the runway. The guests – and the freezing cold models – probably would have preferred to have been treated to that bottle of Piper. I know I would!
The food was gorge though with sushi for starter and wild bass for entrée but it’s hard to stuff your face when these microscopic beauties are gyrating in swimwear beside your table. I felt guilty for eating and felt like I should be feeding them!
Advised by a NI editor that I should get pictures of myself with celebs for a feature I was finding myself in something of a predicament until I spotted Damon Wayans lunching with his posse only two tables away. After bracing myself for the humiliation (I mean – Damon Wayans – really???) I sauntered over to ask if I could get my picture taken with him apologetically stating my position. He looked at me blankly only to respond. ‘Well – ok – as long as I don’t have to stand up or do anything.’’ OK. So as if from nowhere my friend Lindsay appears with my very average digital camera – I pose uncomfortably and the pain is over. But – horror of horrors! We discover afterwards Lindsay never took the picture – or it didn’t save!! I have just debased myself for nothing!! Linsday was then able to inform my that she had just witnessed Wayans’ buddy taking a wee in the sink in the communal toilets. Lovely!! It’s all class and sophistication here in Cannes, I tell you.
By the way – even Wayan’s and his gang weren’t drinking champagne. The credit crunch is clearly hitting everyone!
After the ‘champagne brunch’ (minus the champagne) I legged to the Palais to watch the new Ang Lee movie Woodstock – entitled Taking Woodstock and satrring Eugene Levvy and Liev Schreiber – Naomi Watt’s other half – in a dress. It was pleasant enough.
Then it was time to get showered and changed for the evening parties. We again went to Terrazza Martini for the launch of French lifestyle magazine L’Officiel. Cool songstress VV Brown was performing live with her band as part of a whirlwind visit to the festival before heading home to prepare for appearances this summer on the festival circuit including Bestival and Glastonbury. I got to interview VV and she was really lovely and boy can that girl perform!
After several more martini cocktails we were off to meet an old friend who was visiting the Riviera for a few nights. Still no big celebrity sightings. Cannes Is noticeably quieter and more subdued this year but its still a lot of fun!
The Queen Bee
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Daman Wayans??!!? all right, let's mark this up as a plus for your Cannes-do attitude. But next time, be like Robert De Niro in the Deer Hunter. Don't take the shot - let him go. Just let him go.
ReplyDeleteBut standing on your tippy toes trying to pee into the sink is a touch of class. Proof positive that you are either six years old or Mr Magoo. I'm guessing Daman's friend was neither.
No big sightings? You mean you went to Cannes without pre-planned stalking intinerary and portable easi-kidnap kit just in case you and George Clooney 'coincidentally' bump into each other in a deserted stairwell?
Still, here's hoping... let me know if you ever need an alibi re. stairwell...